offended by the term 'Wench'

[VinZ]

Hi,

I have a serious prospect member for our Church. It is a nice lady from Ireland with the right mindset and great looking.
I told her that in our Church, members are referred to as Wenches and Pirates.

She would feel offended by the term 'Wench' and this is holding her from joining. She agrees to join if she can be referred to as a 'Piresse' instead. Would that be acceptable?

Has anyone there been offended by it and how did you overcome it? Personally I think Wenches are really cool.

Would the Prophet (Pesto be upon Him) agree with the term 'Piresse'?


thanks for your advice,
Vinz

[TwistedSister]

Hi back at ya!
I'm not offended by the term "wench" but since your friend has a problem with it, I suspect we can call her anything she pleases. Just let her know that usually, we just call each other by our screen names.
Hope that helps.

[Roy Hunter]

'Pirate' is not gender-specific: she can be a pirate too. Remember the third "I'd Really Rather You Didn't":

3. I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.(my emphasis)

The term 'Wench' can have negative connotations, but that is not the way we tend to use it. In fact, I like to think we are reclaiming the word for the language, for people to use every day.

Anyway, there's no point in asking for a binding ruling on the word, as we have flimsy moral standards, so we probably wouldn't stick to it anyway.

[Qwertyuiopasd]

To be most accurate, I think members of our Church are referred to as Pastafarians. Pirates are His favored creation, but one doesn't have to be a Pirate to realize that the universe was created by the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

We're happy to call her whatever she would like to be called. As Roy points out, flimsy moral standards leave a lot of wiggle room for things like this.

[daftbeaker]

I'm willing to call her a pooface if that helps?

[Tigger_the_Wing]

Tell her to join! I'm a pirate granny! Too old to be a plausible wench.

Whereabouts in Ireland? My home is in Co. Cork.

…Uh-oh, if she's from Kerry she might not like that.

So if she is, don't tell her, OK?

[sweetlife]

nope tell her she has to be a wench ;) gotta keep them in their place LOL

[DavidH]

wench
late 13c., wenche "girl or young woman," shortened from wenchel "child" (12c.), from O.E. wencel, probably related to wancol "unsteady, fickle, weak," and cognate with O.N. vakr "child, weak person," O.H.G. wanchal "fickle." The word degenerated through being used in ref. to servant girls, and by mid-14c. was being used in a sense of "woman of loose morals, mistress." The verb meaning "to associate with common women" is from 1590s.

[black bart]

Good King Wenchless would be a good name for her.

[DavidH]

Indeed. And it occurs to me that if that etymology is right, wench is closely related to a very rude word indeed. Ten dubloons if you can spot it.

[black bart]

wancol...sounds a bit dodgy...often heard at a Rangers v Celtic match?

[DavidH]

I think you've got it, Bart. 10 Dubloons to your account.

[Horza]

Surely the etymology, no matter how suspect, isn't what makes it offensive but rather the common use and intent? I can't recall the last time I heard someone denigrating women by calling them wenches.

[Qwertyuiopasd]

Or on the flip side, the etymology of the gay bashing F-word isn't particularly offensive, and in England they still use it to refer to cigarettes.

It's never the word itself, it's how it's used. Which is why the idea of auto-censoring certain words seems silly to me, but that's a whole other topic...

[Roy Hunter]

Which is why the idea of auto-censoring certain words seems silly to me, but that's a whole other topic...

You have no idea how much trouble automatic content control causes for people who live or work in Scunthorpe...