Prayer Book...of sorts

Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.

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Prayer Book...of sorts

Postby Bringerofpie on Wed Aug 09, 2006 7:09 pm

As a tribute to His Noodliness, I am compiling stories, suggestions, and other things (such as the Creed in the START HERE forum) and compiling them (in buddyprofile.com for easy access). Does anyone have suggestions or contributions?
"Now watch this drive."
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Postby AloneWithTheGospel on Wed Oct 25, 2006 4:53 pm

I just wrote ( As I was bored) The Five tales of the Macaroni... It's quite interesting, If not a bit short....

“ I was lost, forgotten in the world…or so it seemed. Then, the midget/mountain spawning FMS came upon me, and gave me these words of faith: ‘ Ye, though you walk through the valley of the spicy of chicken, you will fear no food. For you are the Pasta-iest son of a Flying Spaghetti Monster in the valley.’ â€￾
Macaroni 1.0

“ His noodle-ness graced me with His presence, and touched me with His noodly appendage, and I falleth over in a fit of laughter. For His Saucy-ness is too much to bear, and the Noodle power nearly tickled Me to death. But, I am forgiven for all the hamburgers I Have eaten, and been welcomed into the world of Pasta.â€￾
Macaroni 2.0

“ Soon, I became of the sauce. I was one with the noodle, combined with the Parmesan, as whole as the tomato. I was brought into the light of Boiling Water by the Creator himself, as was creed by our Savior.â€￾
Macaroni 3.0

“ Adorned with the Pirate-iest outfit in the land, I marched forth unto the growing populace. I spoke of the divine FMS, and of the Stripper Factory/Beer Volcano of Heaven, and brought with me the masses to the Church Of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.â€￾
Macaroni 4.0

“ As the leader led us into our prayer, a large group gathered outside. The hating outsiders were angry with our faith, but we were not discerned. For the Flying Spaghetti Monster protected thy self, and we erupted in a chorus of prayer once more.â€￾
Macaroni 5.0

I'm actually planning on working off of these, to form the actually Tales of Saint Macaroni....
"Our pasta, who art in a colander, draining be your noodles. Thy noodle come, Thy sauce be yum, on top some grated Parmesan. Give us this day our garlic bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trample on our lawns. And lead us not into vegetarianism, but deliver us some pizza, for thine is the meatball, the noodle, and the sauce, forever and ever. Ramen. "
Kanys, On Holy Prayers
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Re: Prayer Book...of sorts

Postby neeter on Sun Dec 17, 2006 4:07 am

Bringerofpie wrote:As a tribute to His Noodliness, I am compiling stories, suggestions, and other things (such as the Creed in the START HERE forum) and compiling them (in buddyprofile.com for easy access). Does anyone have suggestions or contributions?



I have recieved word from the FSM through Tish Llub, the most piraty pirate of them all, that FSM is on the lookout for PB&J sandwiches.

Tish Llub once gave FSM a PB&J sandwich, which FSM ate and declared good. FSM then smote the ship deck with His Noodely Appendage and filled hitherto empty barrels with various pasta dishes, and kegs of cold beer appeared, aghr.

From then on, Tish Llub has been spreading the word, and teaching recruitment pirates how to make PB&J sandwiches.

Now FSM does not need PB&J for any reason except that He likes them, and so eating them makes Him less inclined to be annoying in His teasing.


I am going to leave a PB&J out for a few nights (a fresh one each night) just in case FSM has chosen my house to move things around, or tamper with me credit rating, oh, arrgh, I mean booty.

:pirate_fish: :pirate_fish: :pirate_fish: :pirate_fish: :pirate_fish: :pirat
All HAil His Noodliness!
Ramen
neeter
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