The Person Below Me

[Ravi Oli]

Assistant to the Assistant actually Roy.

All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players;
TPBM has made more exits than entrances

[black bart]

Arrrgh matey tis many thee time I ave cheated the hangman's noose so I don't mind bein thrown out o thee Benbow for not payin me tab.

TPBM can't believe that Captain Kirk is 81!

[la la]

I remember watching Star Trek long ago when I was a wee wee bairn - I don't think I was more than about 6 years old and I used to sit on my grandfather's lap and watch it with him. He used to tell me stories about what was happening in the show. This was back when tv only had one channel (and no, I'm not kidding about that.) Wow, I miss my grandpa so much right now!

TPBM knows the value of a bit of nostalgia now and then.

[black bart]

Aaaargh that be trooo matey...that be trooo....

It were a dark an stormy night an all thee boards did creak...I were a lowlee cabin boy in them days an I always kept me back to thee scuppers. I remembers me first Cap'n loik it was yesterday...Cap'n Brown Bartholemooo thee Bastard. He were a hard man who'd ave thee skin orf yer back as good as look at ye...an that's if he were in a good mood. One day we were sailin orf thee coast orf Tortuga when thee Cap'n cried out fer Rum..."Fetch me rum yer blaggards...or I'll Keel Haul every man jack of ye". Imagine me terror when I finds out that every last drop o rum had been drunk thee night before whilst we celebrated thee First Mates Birthday! Me first thought was ta jump over board an swim fer it...take me luck wiv thee sharks...

TPBM wishes I had finished the story.

[Almighty Doer of Stuff]

Aye, matey, I wish ye finished it right after "It were a dark an stormy night"!

TPBM dances to the beat of their own bum.

pbbbbt... pphrrppt...pweeeeerppr...

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

That I do, though it is difficult seeing as I don't own a drum and don't like to dance.

TPBM has an inspirational thought about how to fix the government of a random country.

[Ravi Oli]

I have several ideas for our government that could lead to:
1. World Peace
2. Cure all diseases
3. End poverty and starvation
4. Clean up all pollution and end the threat of Global Warming.
Which one would you chose?

TPBM probably read ^^'s reply better than TPAM and has a good repertoire of fart jokes for our entertainment.

[Roy Hunter]

I do, but I'll just skip to the punchlines.
"...and when he opened the door, the dog came into the room."
"...abcess makes the farts go Honda."
"...no, they always look like that."

TPBM has a joke that they could go to jail for.
(I know I certainly do...)

[Rainswept]

I have one I'm often told I'm going to hell for.

Did you know Jesus was very popular with the ladies? Guy was hung like this:

TPBM laughed at that, even though they did not want to.

[PKMKII]

Can't help it, I always laugh at broken image tags.

TPBM likes to randomly delete semicolons.

[Rainswept]

Maybe, but that's nothing compared to what TPBM does to colons.

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

I make quite an impact on them.

TPBM knows what to do with an impacted colon.

[Roy Hunter]

That should sort out the problem.

TPBM has a big book of home remedies for everything.

[Rainswept]

I do, but it needs updating. It just recommends leeches for everything.

TPBM wears diapers on a daily basis, and will explain why.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

^ wuvz Karl Marx

fus pose