Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Arrr, I be a pirate!

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Bananas

Postby black bart on Mon Feb 18, 2008 5:16 pm

The midgits sighed...who will massage our aching limbs now after a hard days banana picking? Position the sirens in readiness for the next ship Hairy Norman, I feel a large banana fritter coming on...
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby PantyGnawer on Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:04 am

PG sneaks in and steals all your rum
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Postby CATPIN_PUFF on Wed Apr 30, 2008 10:56 pm

Chow is ye still rite dis t'read?
I'M IN UR CROWNEST CHASIN UR CROWZ
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Postby ChowMein on Thu May 01, 2008 3:13 am

Yup ,
Doh it been ona hi anus fer a spell cuzzen oi dun loss thee menuscrip !
Enyhows oi be moor innerestid in werkin' on me cookbook !
Mad Willyum , he bein' a smart ass , sez he has sommat in his mine an' all , he dun resurched dis 'ere tred an he rites okay oi gess , thee rest ove ye lot arr alwazes welkum .
Enywaze , thee croo 'ove thee Raging Queen 'as cot werd 'ove the war wiff thee Current Ventarrs an' day be alla flutter an' dresstid up fer a parrdee !
Thay be onna Midgit Eyelanz at thee momint .

It be all yers Mad Willy , ARGH !
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Postby pieces o'nine on Thu May 01, 2008 5:17 am

Pyrate Pye

5 large bilge rats, skinned an deboned, slyce 'em up a bit
280g weevils, diced
2 dl parrot squeezins
salt an pepper ter tayste, iffin ye has it
1 cl rum
3/4 cl fishwisky
pye cruste

Lyne yer pan wiv haf thee pye cruste. Micks thee ovver hingreedyents; toss lytley wiv thee rum an fishwiskey. Arrrange in thee pye crust an slap thee over haf ov thee pye cruste ovver thee toppe and stab hit a few toimes wiv yer cutlass ter make steeme vents. Bake in yer oven (a mid-soized fyre) huntil thee top cruste be turrrnin brown and ye heeres the sizzlin ov thee contents. (Habout thee toime hit takes fer thee crewe t'swabbe thee deck.)

This be a speshul treate haboard Thee Mad Moggies Revenge wen we've bin out at sea fer sum toime.

NOTE: ye may save an tan thee bilge rat hydes fer thee fur trayde wen yer sailin' in thee Newe Werlde, ter pick up sum hextra coin if ye loikes. Bilge rat or beever, those gits wot weare toppe 'ats won' nose thee divrens.
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby ChowMein on Wed Sep 03, 2008 2:47 am

As i trod thee pathe to thee ship muttering to Meseff ," I haven't enough material to publish Meseff , what do you think about opening a little restaurant In Portsmouth as a new venture ? "

" Well ", whistled Meseff , an orange and blue parrot , " yarr , ye rat recipes went over well here , too bad your breeding program was so successful ".

I said goodbye to our rat infested island and vowed to bring back some other beasties to take care of this mess , thee rest of thee gang agreed so thee Queen stocked with all we could plunder from the islands before the ships rats got to it all and set sail for Portsmouth .

Join thee seamen next week when Meseff recounts harrowing tales from thee island in chapter whatever .
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby ChowMein on Wed Sep 03, 2008 10:31 am

Tales And Other Feathers , frum thee log of Meseff

It has been many years since I have been shipwrecked upon this island , my ship and crew rendered to bits upon the reef of this island in the middle of this vast blue .
Though lacking nothing in material wants and needs , a civilized conversation I do yearn for , one amongst thee natives is a humorous thought indeed .
I just get a twerp or a twitter from this lot , they have appallingly drab taste in feathers as well , I do regret to mention .

And so I prayed and prayed and one day thought there be no FSM !

Oh , I am ashamed for , lo and behold !

Thee Raging Queen landed .

Oh joy , oh rapture and bliss ... (continued affer oi get back from thee job )

Ahoy ! , Oi gots it m8s , I finely figgourd out wot dis 'ere thread be about . It seems to me to be a ; Continuous Cohesive Tale With Multiple Posts , ya ...oi loike thet wun , bedder be orf to thee job .
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby ChowMein on Wed Sep 03, 2008 7:38 pm

dammit , wot wuz oi goan on abowt ?!
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby pieces o'nine on Fri Sep 05, 2008 8:56 pm

Yarrr, Chow, 'as ye bin row-lin in thee ergot-hinfested catte-nip agin?
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby ChowMein on Thu Feb 26, 2009 2:44 pm

Chaptarr Sumfing

Arrr , thee contents offe my snuffe boxe is empty .
We are therefore forced to return to Portsmouth for vices ( an maybe some hammarrs and saws while we're at it ) .

First a light snack of Peenut Bunny Strips :

Cut your bunny into bite sized bits and coat them in marinade of smashed peanuts , chopped seeweed , minced garlic , wee bit of molasses , ground weevils , finely grownde Chilly pepparrs an' wee bit of ale.
Put in your iceburg box for three hours or whatever .

Dry out thee liddle feet to pass to ye neeces an' nefyews as lucky charms .

Set your fire pit to noice , evenly lit coals .

While ye be awaitin' for ye oven ta warm ye can shrike thee wee bits of Bugs or whatever ye called yer bunny onna pointy liddle sticks so all yer mateys get some .
Now cook them fings an' don't ye leave 'em alone else ye burn thee stuff .
While we had lunch , I plotted our course .

First ! We must rescue NYBB from that horrible pirate getup that Tigger Thee Wing dreessed thee blighter in .
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard on Fri Feb 27, 2009 5:52 pm

YESSSS !

Urry ep an stave me mateys !
RrrRrrrRRrr!
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard on Tue May 12, 2009 11:54 am

warr rrrrr ya puddy tat? :bounce:
i stull be dressd in wot Tigga daWing gib me so far :furious:
antie pon stull werkin on me wegaleeya
i fink :bounce:
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby TwistedSister on Wed May 13, 2009 11:36 am

Puddy Tat was baking you some more fish head cookies.
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby ChowMein on Fri May 15, 2009 6:26 pm

Nef Yoo BlackBeard wrote:warr rrrrr ya puddy tat? :bounce:
i stull be dressd in wot Tigga daWing gib me so far :furious:
antie pon stull werkin on me wegaleeya
i fink :bounce:
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr


Hold on to yer dyaper !

We hasa make pyes fer thee trip foist !
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Re: Pirate Chef on the High Seas

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard on Sat May 23, 2009 4:13 pm

HOKAY !

i wull tell yyahz all abowd how ta mak;
Waddermillin Blud

furst ya nedda bigg bowl
din ya nedda big wadderrmillen
an din yah git da big piirit
wiff da reel cutluss
ta run et fru !
an den

an din ya haz 2 peesez

hokay
ye b onna charr
da wadermilin b in fron ob ye
but oft to ech syde
onna kownterr
anna bowl unner yer chin
an dat b onna kownter too

now mussh in yer hanz
indo da waddermilun
an gab big peece
an sweez wadermillin gutz
an alla wadermiilum blud go indo da bowl
an put sum in yer mowff an mush et
mush et en yer mowff
dwibbil da blud in da bowl
spit da ovver stuff owt cos i ettid lotz
an dint whant enymoar waddermilin

mybe sum wadermilin bludd
b in da waddermilin
sum b on tha kowner
dat hokay
ya get lotz back inna bowl
wiff ye hanz
an ya kin alwaze yuse a straw
but i dint need straw

Now ye kin surve tha wadermilun blud
affer ya pik owt da seedz wiff ye hanz
dem waddermilin seeds b slippy!
et take a long tyme
ta get alla seedz
luky fer me
i go ta washrm a reddy

tha foist 2 cusamers luvd et
but no moor cussamers wen
dey sawd tha keechen b mussy :furious:
den thay lookd :drunk: :shocked: :barf:

i dint cell eny wadermilin blud thet dey .


::::::::::::::( Based on an actual story ):::::::::::::::::::
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.
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