Fun Stuff to Do When You're Bored

[daftbeaker]

Print the post, and tape it to thigh, next to genitals....That'll help.

I'll be funny when you try to remove it and rip out loads of hair?

No..Well, that too..but.

I merely suggested that the weak joke, which only produces a mild smirk, or at most, pained chuckle, will be boosted by taping the printed post to his naked pelvic region, which almost invariably inspires gales of laughter from all who see it.

teamwork....what its all about.

That actually made me giggle (as opposed to the original pun which was, quite frankly, sh*t)

Anyway, my suggestion for boredom relief is to speak about yourself in the 3rd person - (Walks into restaurant) "Have you got a reservation?"
"No but Daftbeaker would like a table for one"
It works best using your full name when people tend to look at you like you've escaped from somewhere important

[Tigger_the_Wing]

Walk past a bunch of workmen with a very sad look on your face.

Some wag amongst them is guaranteed to say "Cheer up, it might never happen!".

To which you solemnly reply, "It already has." and you slowly and sadly walk away…

Definitely makes 'Wag' look like a complete prick!

Another good one needs a companion.

Wear something really outrageous (I wear a HUGE, sequined, velvet bow-tie) and wander around the city at lunchtime. When you spot someone in a group looking at you and then turning to her friends and obviously muttering "Don't look now, but…" that is your cue. In a voice designed to carry clearly to the whole group, tell your companion "Did you just see that woman? She's telling her friends not to look at me!" You may elaborate, but I can tell you that, having been caught out in a social faux pas your 'victim' won't know where to look!

[ken worley]

In an area where buskers, human statues, and other street performers congregate to annoy passersby...

Late at night, quickly build an absolutely soundproof plexiglass box, 10' x 10' x 10'.
Kidnap a mime, and place him inside the sealed box, before dawn.

Come back every couple of days to see whether he/she has starved to death, or if someone has eventually caught on, and let them out.

When you tire of this trick, take the box deep into the forest, and drill some airholes in the top.

Kidnap mimes on the weekends, and take them into the forest, and one by one, "break them", by putting them in the box, and not letting them out till they request, [verbally, that you do so.

If a sufficient number of us regular people do this, even just one weekend a month, I am confident that we can end mimery in our lifetime.

[Roland Deschain]

^ Now that sounds like a most excellent idea. I have had a bad experience with a mime. He started out with his head down, so we gave him a couple of Swiss Francs for a picture with my friend standing next to him, then just when I was about to take a picture, the bastard stopped his pose. They are truly the most evil beings ever created.

I was going to say that when you are bored, do something notty ( ), but feeling as if I must keep the thread in at least a semblance of cleanliness, not to mention that I am mostly bored when on public transport, hence the notty thing being likely to get me arrested if I took my own advice, I changed my mind.

[black bart]

I scrolled back to the beginning of this thread. There are some hilarious posts back there so I'm not bored anymore...lazy but effective.